In a Pickle (Ur What? Part Two)

Scene Set Up:

We bring home a giant jar of dill pickle slices from Smart n'Final. Travis eats two small bowls of pickles and drinks the juice. He is very happy. Aaron hates pickles and refuses to eat them.

Scene:

Travis is running around with a pickle in his hand. The pickle is his toy and he's having a great time with his little pickle friend. Enter Aaron.

Aaron: "Mom, Travis is waving his pickle at me!"

Travis laughs maniacally. Aaron screeches.

Aaron: "Mom, Travis just touched me with his pickle!"

More laughter ensues and Aaron about loses it.

I on the other hand am just laughing, especially after the Uranus episode of last week. Apparently we've moved on to Travis chasing Aaron around with a pickle. I intervened before Aaron needed counseling and told Travis to keep his pickle to himself. Boys.

I apologize to all of you have offended. I assure you more sane posts will be made later...in about 15 years.

--Laurel

Ur What?

An actual conversation held earlier this evening in the Baker house.

Aaron: "Look at my homework Dad, I finished it."

Aaron proudly displays his solar system drawing to Billy and names off the planets one by one.

Billy: "Great! But you're missing one."

Aaron looks perplexed.

Billy: "Have you ever heard of Uranus?" (Ur-Anus)

Aaron gives Billy a quizical look.

Aaron: "No, I must have missed that one."

Billy: "Hmmm...."

Aaron: "Where is Uranus?"

Billy: "You don't know where Uranus is?"

Cue another weird look from Aaron as Dad, Mom and Austin start laughing.

Aaron: "Where does Uranus go?"

Billy: "Uranus is somewhere between Neptune and Pluto."

Aaron thinks again.

Aaron: "What color is Uranus?"

Billy: "I don't know, I've never seen Uranus!"

Dad, Mom and Austin are now laughing doubled over. Aaron laughs nervously along with us unsure of why we're cracked up.

Please note: we took mercy upon Aaron's little soul and let him in on the joke. His take?

Aaron: "You mean Uranus is your butt?"

Billy: "Yep."

Aaron falls on the floor prostrate laughing uncontrollably almost to the point of tears. Now hopefully he won't get kicked out of school tomorrow when he tells all of his friends.

Okay, Okay, Okay!

Fine! I give in. Nobody is blogging right now because they all have jobs to do. The one day that I have nothing major to do no one is posting anything. I've been trying to avoid housework by wandering around the blogs and have found little to fill my time. Because of your virtual silence I can hear my conscience telling me to get off my butt and clean the bathrooms.

Let it be known that you all have driven me to scrub toilets free of little boy pee for entertainment.

Some group of friends you are!

--Laurel

The Greatest Cure

Today was much better than yesterday. The only real stressful time was at the Post Office (then again when is it not stressful? ) Plus, I have issues with mail men....just ask Billy. Don't get me wrong, I love my current guy, its just the random ones I have run into elsewhere.

I could feel my crankiness ramping up again this afternoon at the grocery store where I screwed up with my coupons. Ralph's messed up on their end as well by about $6. When I went in to have them correct the problem they overcorrected it and I came ahead in the end. As we drove home, poor Tamila the sacrifical lamb who had gone shopping with me, was munching on a Crunch bar (free!) when I spied the remainder of it in her hand. Seeing it I realized she was holding my cure. Chocolate.

Let me tell you, that little square piece of chocolate was just as miraculous as a whole bar. I feel much better now. As for the rest of the day, I got to enjoy watching both Aaron and Austin play baseball at the same time. To see Aaron on his field doing his little happy dances while the big guys slug it out on their diamond brings about an awesome feeling of parental pride. Meanwhile, Tamila and Travis ran from field to field with their pack of friends and got along well.

So there,
Chocolate + cranky family= world peace!

--Laurel

Monster

Last night I crashed big time. Maybe it was the kid friendly pancake dinner, hormones or who knows what, but I was cranky. My eye was hurting and I was tired. I wanted to go to sleep and I wanted to go to sleep as soon as possible. I rushed the kids off to bed at 8:30. The older kids were in bed by 9. When someone came out to annoy me with an idiotic question or excuse I tersely shooed them back to their rooms.

In short...I was grumpy.

This morning as I was driving Aaron to school I mentioned that I was feeling much better from sleeping last night. Aaron smirked and said, "Yeah, Mom you were a monster last night."

I told him he was being silly...I wasn't that mean!

Nope, he reiterated again this time with a serious look: "Mom...you were monster."

Ouch.

Mind you this is coming from a kid who makes blood curdling screams and acts as if he's on death door when any of his siblings look at him wrong. That little grain of salt doesn't make the statement any better.

So here's looking for a better day and evening: no more pancakes for dinner no matter how hard the kids beg. Pancakes are bad for their emotional health!

--Laurel

Scary

Aaron's team mom sent me the link to this predator mapping website. John Walsh put together the website so you can know who's in your neighborhood. I tracked at least 5 convicted criminals within a mile of my house--all of their crimes involved children under the age of 14. So, check out the site: it will scare you, yet give you a heads up on who is in your area. (It includes pictures, profiles and descriptions so you know who you're looking out for.)

--Laurel

Yo I'm Out

I'm going to try to borrow some sugar. The blogathon was great!

Yeah, I know this'll gross you out

I went to the Dr. today because my eye was irritating me. Apparently I have a corneal edema (not threatening in any form.) The edema is that little blistery thing you see on the white of my eye. I have to stay out of the sun and use all sorts of eye drops to stave off infection and keep things lubricated. Dr. Aish said that I probably got it from the sun. Lovely, eh?

Just thought I'd share my point of view.

-Laurel

P.S. Kurt I told him that you thought he was an awesome Dr. He thought you were a nice guy.

I Am Missing Earl

This Blog - a - thon is preventing me from watching what appears to be a really funny episode of Earl. Every time I start to watch it (I TIVO ed it) I see someone's new comment and miss all of the punchlines. I will watch it later. I am going to try to watch "Survivor" now.

Take Your Medicine

If you know me very well, you are aware that I wear my emotions on my sleeve. I say what I mean and I mean what I say. I usually have to get things off of my chest when I am not enjoying something before I can begin to enjoy it.

Right now I feel like forced blogging is like taking your medicine. It is not always fun to take your medicine, but it will make you feel better. That's how I feel about forced blogging, but later tonight when the blogging marathon is over I will be better for it.

I Ate Real Sushi in Vegas

Curtis, Shane and I went to NAB in Las Vegas this week and as always had a great time sharing and learning with the boys at GURUS as well as continuing the new building process with Ben and the boys from Mankin Media.

At lunch yesterday we went to a Sushi joint. I usually will have a California roll or tempura, maybe even a spicy tuna roll. This time, I took a big leap and ate a Red Dragon Roll. It is essentially a spicy tuna roll with a piece of tuna wrapped around it.

To some, no big deal, to me a breakthrough. The texture and taste was not at all like what I imagined looking at it on my plate. It worked out great and I liked it. I liked it a lot.

Kurt's Comics

Whew! Dodged a bullet!

The U.S. Geological Survey (USGS) just had a representative on Fox. He was telling all Californians to expect a massive earthquake sometime in the next 30 years. Mind you he was "forecasting" an earthquake-- not "predicting" one. As he was delivering this lovely reminder, the scroll across the bottom reassured me with this:


"USGS says California will not fall into the ocean."


I feel much better now. I will no longer have to wear flippers and a life vest wherever I go!

-Laurel

Wah? Huh? Where did Everyone go?

I started crashing on the couch around 7:30 tonight. I vaguely remember Aaron and Travis running in and out of the room. Somehow I managed to direct them in my sleep haze to take their showers and put them in bed around 8:30. Next thing I know I woke up a little before 10 and the whole house was dead quiet. All of the kids were in bed. I checked their rooms to make sure they all hadn't ditched me for a party somewhere, but sure enough--they were asleep.

I have no idea when the older two went to bed. Obviously sometime before 10. I know in my day I would've been whooping it up by watching tv or reading books if I'd had the chance. I used to drive my parents nuts by never wanting to go to bed. In fact, they would send me to bed and I would lurk on the stairs waiting to see what happened after my bed time. I had this strange fantasy that they would breaking out the smokes and start cussing up a storm once I was out of earshot. Alas, that fantasy never came true. But I did spend an inordinate amount of time waiting on the stairs. My poor parents were stalked by their own child!

Anyway, you know you've reached a new stage in life when your children put themselves in bed without you saying a word or even being conscious. Now if I could only train them to do the dishes before they head off to La La land.

Beggars can't be choosers!

-Laurel

A Rare Moment

Travis is asleep.

During the day.

Who is this kid and where did the real Travis go?

-Laurel